Dear College Freshman

Dear college freshman,

Unless you, like me, are simultaneously lucky and unlucky enough to go to a school that operates on the quarter system, you have probably moved into your dorm room, met 2059 new people (all friends, of course), and started your first year of college classes.

So. How are you? I sincerely hope you are absurdly excited for your new adventure. You’re about to learn so many new things that you won’t remember them all this time next year. You’re going to grow into your own person, one separate from the expectations of your family and the people you went to high school with. You’re going to eat dessert for meals and midnight pizza and get far too little sleep. It’s going to be really great.

And, really, don’t you already feel at home? You’ve morphed your standard-issue dorm room into your space, found yourself some fantastic friends, and you walk around campus knowing that you’re at the right place. You are so, so lucky to be where you are and you feel it strongly right now.

This is the feeling I want you to remember in a couple of weeks or months. 

See, you’re a little high on the newness of everything right now. You haven’t hit midterm season yet, or written your first essay. You haven’t gotten back a grade you weren’t totally satisfied with. Your family members back home probably haven’t eaten at your old favorite restaurant without you. And you haven’t had to get through any real friend drama without the support of the people who know you best. When you do experience those things, this wonderful school-home that you’re loving right now is probably not going to feel so wonderful. In fact, you will probably sometimes want to run home-home, hide under the covers in your childhood room, and never emerge (ever).

WHOA. It sounds like I’m trying to rain on your parade, yeah? I pinky-promise you, I’m not. Ready to hear me out? Let’s do this.

Remember how I said I want you to remember the feeling you have about school right now in a few months? I was serious. That feeling is the truth. Sure, maybe you are a little overenthusiastic about life at this exact moment, but step back from that for a second. 

When you step back, you will realize that you did come to this school for a reason. The school chose you, and you chose the school right back. Something about it felt right to you and told you that you would be happy here. That feeling was (mostly) unobscured by stress and drama in much the same way that your first few exhilarating days on campus are. That feeling was your gut, and you were right to listen to it, even when it feels like you couldn’t have been more wrong. And don’t worry: the times you feel like you made a huge mistake will more than likely be dwarfed in number by the times you know you did the right thing.

So, this is me (about to enter my second year of college) telling you (a freshman), that I hope you are loving this time of enormous transition and change. I hope it seems amazing right now. I hope it seems amazing most of the time. But I also hope you know that it’s okay if it isn’t always so great. That doesn’t mean you aren’t at the right school or that you’re doing something wrong. It just means you’re a human being in a new place, and that’s hard. And that’s okay.

Study! Have fun! Good luck!

Love,

Ellen

It's okay if #college is harder or different than you expected it to be. #bgbcommunity Share on X

No questions, but I’d love to hear your thoughts. And I’d love it if you shared it with the new college students in your life. Thanks ❤️